I believe Catwoman only wor this ridiculous costume once in the seventies, and then never again. For whatever reason, Mego decided “Let’s go with the brothel madam look.” Even then, they couldn’t make it look as nice as the box art they got it from, which is admittedly kind of cute.
However, nothing beats Silver Age Catwoman and her sexy getup. Which is why I’m so glad I got my hands on this amazing custom and matching box.
Doncha wish your Catwoman was HOT. like. ME?
Donchaaaahhh….
My name is Mike MacDee, and I’m an indie author. I’ve published several books in various ways, and I have several more in the works. I have a large body of work because, with few exceptions, I always finish what I start.
I don’t use black magic or self-help books to make it happen, either. I just follow three simple guidelines.
How many of you have seen Stanley Kubrick’s The Shining? How long did it take Jack Nicholson to get out of that hedge maze?
Exactly. He didn’t make it out. He could have used a map.
Know who else needs a map? A novelist. A short story author. Fiction writers in general.
The blank page is the greatest enemy of every writer. Besides self-doubt, inflated ego, Amazon arbitrarily deleting your reviews, and left wing nutjobs getting you banned from all your platforms. But all those don’t usually end your project before it starts. Nothing is more soul-crushing that staring into that yawning white void of nothingness and having your mind go completely blank.
Well, maybe the de-platforming thing. But I digress.
This is why planning ahead is so important. Filmmakers don’t just jump into making a movie; they do pre-production first. It’s the same for authors: before you start writing your book, outline the plot and characters. Every time I sit down to write a new short story or novel, I do a brief synopsis to plot out the beginning, middle, and end.
There are a number of reasons why you should do this, but the most important one is that you will iron out any major issues with plot and characters before you even start the writing process. Writing without an outline is like navigating a maze without a map. Don’t be Jack Nicholson.
And believe me, you’d rather not find out the hard way if that maze has no exit. You’d much rather learn your plot doesn’t work two days into the outlining phase, than two years and two-thirds of the way through the first draft.
But your outline isn’t gospel, so don’t treat it as such. You will undoubtedly change it before you finish the story. I can’t tell you how many characters I’ve killed in the course of writing Last of the Ghost Lions that were originally supposed to survive to the end. Sometimes a character’s life is literally getting in the way of plot progression, which makes them expendable.
I’m digressing. The path you’ve plotted out won’t necessarily be the one you end up with, and that is absolutely okay. The outline’s purpose is mainly to get you started.
A lot of newbie authors begin their stories with exposition. Don’t. You’re forcing me to do homework before I can have my literary dessert.
I’m not gonna care about your world unless you MAKE me care through the protagonist and the conflict.
If your story is about a little kid surviving in a dystopian world, I don’t care about your setting’s backstory. I care about that kid. Feed me snippets of the setting through the kid’s adventures, but don’t lose focus on the kid.
Richard Stark has a much better method for introducing the reader to a new story.
First line from Firebreak (Richard Stark): “When the phone rang, Parker was in the garage, killing a man.” WHAM! Stark opens the book by hitting the reader in the face with a baseball bat made of questions. Who is Parker? Why is he killing somebody in the garage? Who’s calling? Hell, whose house is Parker in? Is this HIS garage we’re talking about, or did he just break into some poor bastard’s house? We HAVE to read on to find out more, and we’re loving it because the questions keep mounting, and they’re great questions. With one sentence we’ve been pulled into the action like a trout into a fishing boat.
This is called beginning a story “in media res”. The narrative jumps straight into the middle of the action. If done right, it can be jarring and exciting, and gets the ball rolling for both the author AND the reader.
But maybe starting off with a bang isn’t enough. Maybe we also want the reader to understand what the story is about. At the end of the day, after all the car chases, or awkward dates, or spellcasting classes, or fights with giant monsters, every story is about one thing. A boy’s love for a girl, a war hero coping with guilt. Or maybe we want to establish the central plot device: the threat looming on the horizon, which the hero is constantly reminded of.
In Media Res can help you write an effective prologue, in a way.
“If you wait for inspiration, you’re not a writer, you’re a waiter.”
Writing is just like going to the gym. You don’t always feel like going, and some days even dread it. But once you get started, you get into it, and next thing you know, six hours have gone by and you have no idea how you lost track of the time or made so much progress.
That’s really all there is to it. Outline a plan for the narrative; throw the reader (and yourself) into the action; then sit down and crank it out whether you want to or not. The alternative is to sit around waiting to be inspired, and that’s a long wait.
Recently picked up a lot of micro playsets, two of which I wasn’t interested in: I already sold my Pocket Land amusement park sets (the blue one), and the pink heart has a cute wind-up diorama that is kind of amusing, but not my thing.
What IS my thing is tiny, adorable indian tribes.
No idea who made this. Maybe Simba. But it’s absolutely precious and I couldn’t pass it up, considering its rarity. It gives Western Polly another environment to explore as well.
The detail in this little knock-off is surprising. I especially love the grandma wrapped in a poncho, the cute little dog, and the awesome collapsible totem pole.
I never understood why Congo got such a reputation as one of the worst films of all time. I think people are just bitter that they went in expecting something like Jurassic Park, and got something else instead, so they panned it.
Which is a shame, because it has a lot going for it. It’s an entertaining jungle adventure film like what they used to make way back in the 1930s, with an ensemble cast of quirky protagonists hopping from one insane setpiece to the next: EVERYTHING is out to get them, not just killer apes, but also killer hippos, crooked African paramilitary units, vicious weather, a volcano that threatens to destroy their destination shortly after they arrive, and even dick-eating leeches. It has a cute talking gorilla, and makes it feasible (via possibly fictional “sign language to speech” technology). It features badass guide and scoundrel Munroe Kelly, one of the best characters Ernie Hudson ever got to play; and Laura Linney as a tough female protagonist who doesn’t ditch her femininity. It has Tim Curry chewing the scenery as only he can. It features several memorable one-shot characters, like smart-mouthed Eddie Ventro (Joe Pantoliano), slimy Captain Wanta (Delroy Lindo) who steals the one scene he’s featured in, and the spooky but friendly Ghost Tribesmen. The Zinj apes are scary as hell. The ape suits are remarkably well done, and the apes themselves remarkably well acted. It has a good score by Jerry Goldsmith.
It also has an action figure line that’s hit or miss.
Kenner was notorious for two things: questionable likenesses, and recycling molds from their other toy lines. Congo is an egregious example, with the vehicles and humans consisting of 90% recycled parts from the Jurassic Park and Aliens toy lines of the early 90s. That said, the human protagonists look pretty cool regardless.
If you’re a Jurassic Park collector and find your collection wanting for badass black guys, the Congo toy line is here for you. It has no less than three such figures: barrel chested Kahega (center) and two variants of Munroe Kelly. With the exception of two “deluxe” figures (the Munroe on the right with the working bazooka, and the Bonecrusher ape in the background), none of the figures had action features, which was fine with my past child self: no action features means no weird gimmicks to get in the way. Kenner would have just recycled them from Jurassic Park anyway (they recycled other JP parts within that very same toy line already). I’m disappointed in the lack of Tim Curry here, but I can always try to make a custom figure to include him in the lineup.
Karen Ross is basically Ellen Ripley with a makeover, and I probably like her least as a result. I’d like to get a (unfortunately rare) Sarah Harding figure from the Lost World line and revamp her into a new Karen. She does feature a big “power diamond” which can be fitted onto some of the other figures’ accessories, including Amy’s computer backpack.
Which brings me to the highlight of the Congo toy line: the apes.
Amy is extremely cute and impossible not to love. She comes with her sign language translator just like in the movie, and she’s endearingly dainty compared to the rest of the apes.
Said apes, hailing from the Lost City of Zinj, are a sight to behold. The sculpts are amazing, and they’re made of vinyl just like Bandai Godzilla toys, so they feel just right in your hand. The exceptions are the two Zinj attack monkeys which came with the deluxe figures, and the deluxe Bonecrusher, who rages out with the push of a button on his back.
There was a Pepsi promotional offer where you could mail order a variant of the Blast Face ape (originally named Skinhead, which somehow wasn’t PC enough I guess). Someone on ebay was selling these in droves, so I got three.
A feature that keeps taking me by surprise is the glow-in-the-dark teeth and eyes of the Zinj apes. Totally unnecessary, but it does manage to make these monsters even scarier in the right lighting.
So you’re writing something related to the Greek myths, and Hades is the bad guy for the hundredth time?
Stop it.
Seriously, how many times has Hades been arbitrarily made the bad guy in a Greek themed project? Disney’s Hercules. Herc’s Adventures. The terrible Clash of the Titans remake. And why, cos he’s the king of the underworld?
Hades being the god of the underworld didn’t make him the devil even in mythology. He was the goth kid of the Olympians: he was sullen, and broody, and brought everyone down. He couldn’t be bargained with or bribed, ideal for someone who keeps the spirits of the dead. The worst thing he did was kidnap his crush and force her to be his wife, which is admittedly pretty shitty. But let’s compare him to some of the other gods, shall we?
Zeus – Tyrannical, vengeful serial rapist. Too many instances to name.
Poseidon – See “Zeus” above.
Apollo – Serial rapist.
Hera – Tortured and tormented her husband’s lovers/victims and children. Oh, and she dropped her infant son Hephaestus down the proverbial well for being born ugly, after birthing him to spite Zeus in the first place.
Artemis – Murderous misandrist who had little boys sacrificed to her at her temples and killed you if you even accidentally saw her nude. Also made it very clear she wanted nothing to do with dudes, then killed a male friend for not being attracted to her. Way to send mixed signals, girl.
Aphrodite – You know that female coworker who screws her way to the top, brags about cheating on her bf to get back at him for minor offenses, and acts friendly to your face while plotting behind your back? Give her godly powers and you have this superbitch.
Athena – Turned Medusa into a monster for having the audacity to get raped in one of her temples. Oh yeah, and she helped get the Trojan War underway over not winning a godly beauty contest.
Cronus – Ate his own children to keep them from turning against him later, to prevent them from castrating and usurping him. You know, like he did to his own dad.
Uranus – Wouldn’t let his pregnant wife give birth to Cronus because he was worried the boy would overthrow him. Just crammed that kid back into the womb like his wife was a suitcase.
Ares – There’s a reason he’s the unloved god of senseless violence. He’s an asshole. Which is probably why Aphrodite had tons of kids with him.
Meanwhile during all this, Hades is pretty much keeping to himself downstairs, occasionally dealing with mischievous mortals who keep trying to fuck with him.
In short, if you’re looking for a Greek god as your villain, ANYBODY makes a better choice than Hades. Do a little research and try being different, or use someone who doesn’t get used that much! I used Artemis in The Amityville Nuisance, myself, and she ended up stealing the show a little bit.
It took a lot of time and even more money, but I finally did it: I bagged Sue Storm, and a mint condition one to boot!
Invisible Girl is the nicest looking of the Mego Super Gals. Her head sculpt is nicely detailed and her eyes are strikingly painted and compliment her lush blue bodysuit. This specimen’s golden hair is exquisite as well, with nary a fray or kink. She seems pleased as punch to finally be reunited with her hubby, even if he IS kind of a zombie.
With that, the Fantastic Four are finally completed.
My favorite shows from childhood where Real Ghostbusters, Jonny Quest, and Batman TAS, among others. Sometimes I go back and binge something that was on the air when I was a kid just to see if it holds up or not.
Know which show I expected to be a total cringefest, and ended up enjoying the hell out of? Jem and the Holograms.
Jem and the Fucking Holograms.
It surprised the hell out of me that I actually kind of love this show. Totally expected it to be unwatchable girly tripe about love triangles and eighties feelgood music. Didn’t expect the complex plotlines, the car chases, the ten-times-per-episode brushes with death the girls have with collapsing bridges, runaway cars, burning buildings, BOMBS PLANTED BY MOBSTERS. Didn’t expect the father’s day episode to rip my goddamn heart out. Didn’t expect to laugh like an idiot when the Misfits fucked up several dozen vacations at a ski resort, or went on a joyride in Jem’s car indoors during a lavish party. Didn’t expect the dialogue or visuals to occasionally crack me up.
Least of all did I expect the music to, on some occasions, be awesome (and this coming from a guy who hates musicals). Each episode has three musical numbers accompanied by mini-music videos, which are the highlight of the show (I imagine this goes double for any little girls who had the cassette tapes the dolls came with, ‘cos all those songs got featured on an episode or two). I’m a fan of eighties music and I’ve been bingeing the show and saving the best songs to a personal playlist on youtube.
Jem and the Holograms, our heroines, average two songs per episode, and occasionally have a decent one. I’m guessing with them as the protagonists, they would have to perform the largest number of songs, and therefore they were the most difficult to make consistent quality-wise. They often resemble Debbie Gibson and range from cringey to okay most of the time, mostly since they provide the sort of feelgood tripe one expects from eighties music. While the main theme of the show is undoubtedly sexy, I think there are a couple more stand out examples.
“Who is He Kissing?” has a nice beat and doesn’t get cringey like a lot of Holograms songs. It also has a well-made music video accompaniment, one of my favorites in the series.
“It Depends on the Mood I’m In” is a very cute track that’s easy to dance to, and watching Jem play pretend in the closet is kind of adorable.
The Misfits, Jem’s rivals and series antagonists, have a rougher, punkier Toni Basil sound to counter Jem’s Debbie Gibson flavor. They have maybe one song for every two Holograms songs, and usually perform one every episode. Every other track is decent or good, though their punky style can make them grating at times. They have quite a few listenable songs that are stylistically unusual compared to the Holograms. Between their music, videos, and entertaining personalities, I consider them the best band in the series. Jem is always bubblegum pop, the Stingers are always funk & soul, but every time the Misfits cue up a song, you have NO idea what to expect.
I love the video for this track. Like all Misfits tracks, it’s got a demented edge to it, but it really suits the subject of the song, and the visuals couldn’t be more perfect: Pizzazz being utterly tormented and humiliated while her bandmates helplessly watch. The ending gives me chills every time.
“You Gotta Be Fast” has a great eighties synth beat, and the video showcasing the Misfits wreaking havoc on helpless ski resort clients is a treat to watch.
This video is really fun in a spooky way, and makes me wonder if Jem isn’t using her hologram powers to enhance the performance. The song itself has a lot of oomph and would feel right at home on an eighties rock collection. I love how the Holograms are clearly enjoying the Misfits in action: they’re clearly better sports than the Misfits themselves.
This track is just awesome, and perfectly captures the essence of the Misfits.
This one, a hula beat about how the Misfits had a shitty time in Hawaii, just cracks me up. The tune itself is really cute.
Two bands who wouldn’t be caught dead sharing a stage together, do a joint performance to selfishly split up their runaway members, newfound friends Kimber and Stormer. This is as close to perfect as a song by either band ever got: music, tempo, lyrics, everything is just right.
The Stingers, another rival band, have the least number of songs in the series, but pretty much all of them are AMAZING. Every song this group performs has a professional sound that the other two lack. I absolutely love these guys and their distinctively funky sound, though they also belt out some of the best ballads in the show. “Are You Feeling Alright?” stands out as impossible to dislike.
This is easily my favorite track by the band, despite a weak start that’s borderline acapella. I rate the video up there with Love Sick for awesome visuals that reinforce the lyrics and tell a story as well. Centering it around the most gorgeous member of the band helps a lot, too: Minx is really easy to look at.
“Perfect Match” is extremely easy to dance to, and Riot’s vocals are a real treat and hilariously narcissistic. It’s one of a handful of tunes that are great with or without the accompanying video, although this one has some great visuals referencing famous romances.
Re-live the sci-fi classic in MurphyVision(tm)!
For Extra Gore, Use Nash’s Gore Mod!
Play as Officer Alex Murphy and regain your humanity while seeking revenge against the criminal scum who killed you. Features weapons, villains, and music from the cult classic film! 16 levels of brutal law enforcement! I’d buy that for a dollar!
Attack of the Killer Tomatoes was a weird and curious early 90s toy line based on the cartoon of the same name. It only appeared on shelves for a couple of years, and now even die hard toy collectors are surprised to hear of its existence.
There is something comforting in the silliness and awesomeness of these toys, so they’ve always been a personal favorite. After writing periodic articles about the toys whenever I managed to grab a new acquisition, I finally completed the set! If you’re looking to collect this nutty action figure line, here’s a list of what to expect.
Attack of the Killer Tomatoes was made by Mattel in 1991. The toys all came on these awesome red and green cards covered in bite marks and tomato splats. The larger tomatoes actually poked through the front and back of their respective cards due to their abnormal size or shape, so they had a bubble on the front AND back. The back of each card features a silly “news clipping” narration about the tomato and its human victim.
Every tomato has a “bite” feature: squeeze the soft vinyl toy and it yawns nice and wide to devour anything it can fit into its maw: action figures, broccoli, the dog’s tail, your little sister’s arm, etc. Whether the tomato is small, large, or walking on green, leafy legs, each tomato comes with a hilariously cartoonish human victim that fits perfectly into its mouth.
It’s hard not to love these dumb toys the moment you see them. It’s even harder to collect the whole set: the few times the “walking” tomatoes are listed for sale online (albeit very briefly — blink and you’ll miss the listing to another eager collector), they can run between $120-$200+ on average due to their rarity, especially if they’re complete. So good luck!
Check out my other Killer Tomatoes articles for more details about each figure.
It’s difficult to believe that I’ve somehow managed to round up one of the most obscure and difficult-to-collect toy lines of the 90s…yet here it is: the Ultimato, the rarest bastard of the Killer Tomatoes action figure line!
And what an awesome piece he is! He stomps around on green, leafy ED-209 legs! He’s got a furious, demonic skull-face, scowling so hard his cheeks are cracking! His alien-like claw-tongue lashes out to grab hapless humans and reel them into his gullet! He even comes with a hilariously terrified cop, Officer Bookum!
It’s hard to believe any killer tomato can compete with my personal fave, Missing Tomato Link and Tara, but he’s coming damn close to being my favorite of the lot.
Best of all, he completes the Killer Tomatoes collection, which now sits proudly on my shelf, joining the Mighty Max collection as yet another testament to tenacity. At long last I can close the book on Killer Tomatoes.
I’ve been adding a lot of villains to my Mego collection lately, namely due to the lack thereof in the official lineup for whatever reason. My second custom Mego project is no exception: the Red Skull, archenemy of Captain America!
I started with this handsome resin head I found on ebay. Not sure if the seller acquired it or made it himself, but it’s a swell rendition of the old school Red Skull from the comics, which is what I was aiming for. I was worried his neck plug wouldn’t fit in the hole even with the hot water treatment, but turns out soaking a Mego bod in boiling water for a full minute gives it a very workable consistency, and he popped right in!
With the head attached, I knew he’d need gloved hands that could hold weapons, so I got him a nice pair of Chips arms perfectly suited to the task. Even without his hosen, Herr Schmidt is already looking pretty badass.
His accessories all came from Dr. Mego, with the exception of his nazi armband. I had to print that myself, after several failed experiments in design and size which almost resulted in an awkward conversation with the family about the presence of nazi symbology cluttering the office.
Another awesome box by Dengar, and he’s ready to join the collection! As you can see by the box art, he’s a dead ringer for classic Red Skull! All he needs is his face painted, which I may have to attempt myself, against my better judgement. I’ll post the results here when that happens.
I recently added a classy cravat to make him look more sophisticated. His neck seemed too bare, but with the old green suit, it just didn’t look right. So I pilfered a couple Action Jackson army suits and swapped the pockets, then finally had the head painted by Lynn Stahl of Metalhead Minis.
The end result is perfection! Red Skull has finally joined the ranks of my impressive Mego collection.
Two new acquisitions have brought a lot more green to the collection. I never drew any attention to ol’ Oliver Queen when he came in the mailbox, mainly because it took awhile for his repro box to catch up with him.
Green Arrow is known for being the best head sculpt in the World’s Greatest Super Heroes line, and one of the best designed dolls overall. It’s hard to disagree with that stately beard and ‘stache, although it’s hard to fit him in the box with his hat on unless I turn his head sideways. The box itself is strikingly minimalist in colorscheme, almost entirely green inside and out, with only some yellow lettering for contrast.
On the Marvel end of the spectrum is this awesome custom Mego of Scorpion, who brings the Spider-Man villain count to three (four if you count Punisher, technically). His suit is hand-made, and the resin head modeled from a bald Conan and painted exquisitely. My only complaint is the “base” of his tail, which makes fitting him in his box a tight squeeze.
The box is awesome to behold, too, another ace creation by Dengar on ebay, continuing the green-and-purple theme of the Spider-Man rogues gallery. He rounds out the group nicely in or out of his packaging.
I love this game, and I made a ton of custom modules and expansions for it, all included in my Custom Heroquest Trove!
CONTAINS THE FOLLOWING:
Custom Rules and Mechanics
Revised Armory Cards, US and UK items, plus New Stuff
Revised Spell Cards from Base Game & All Expansions
New Hero Classes: Clerics, Witches, Giants, and More
THE ARDEN DAREDEVILS: My epic campaign with tons of quests.
KELLAR’S KEEP REDUX: Remake of the original Heroquest expansion.
THE SLAVE CITY REDUX: A revised quest pack from Dragon Magazine!
THE CHANGELING: A standalone campaign made for a community project.
THE MANSE MACABRE: an older one-shot in a haunted mansion.
MANHUNT: Detour quests for defeated heroes, instead of perma-killing them.
A Lovecraftian Mod For GZDOOM
It is 1932, and you, Henry Annesly, have just shot your old colleague Crawford in his castle. Now his monstrous servants are enraged, and his resonance engine is splitting the very fabric of the universe, merging the castle with the alien worlds that coexist with the earth! Your only hope now is to shoot your way to the upper levels of the castle and shut down the machine before all existence is reduced to pandemonium!
FEARS is a remake of the Amiga shooter of the same name. Use your flashlight to illuminate the ever-present darkness and blast beings from your worst nightmares.
I’ve ended up with a lot of Batman stuff since I started collecting these, and haven’t said much about them.
The oddest part was, I went an awfully long time without a Joker, despite acquiring an original boxed Riddler, buying a sweet custom Batmobile, converting a fist-fighting Robin to a regular Robin, collecting four Batmen of various types and quality, and going through no less than three Penguins, of which I still have two (a nice T2, and a T1 I can’t seem to get rid of).
Joker himself needs a little work done, since the back of his neck hole is chipped and makes his neck a bit unstable. One of these days I’ll re-string him with a fresh torso. He’s all original, I believe, right down to his shoes (I think), and in really nice shape for the price I got him.
Mike's Toybox 